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The galleys of travelers (special humor)

"The struggles of travelers", article written by Lucile Teillet, a super funny traveler, exclusively for Yogis on Roadtrip:

"Feliz navidad, feliz navidad, feliz navidad" (merry Christmas in Spanish) sung by voices of strident children, with an instrumental to tear your hair out of the loudspeaker, located at 5 cm above my face. I want to fluff the sound to the driver but my glare was enough to make him understand that I was on the verge of becoming dangerous. Yes, because it makes 30h that I do not feel my buttocks, sitting on the same uncomfortable seat in the bottom of a Bolivian bus, to wiggle in all directions. I even think I managed to do some yoga poses without knowing it. Already that the alternative of the unbreathable heating and the icy cold of the air-conditioning force me to remove and put back my sweatshirt, I must also support the diffusion of fifteen films of old actions like the world.

I wake up with a start at every scream of war, saber and false explosion. And when finally, the noise stops for a nap, it is my neighbor who starts to snore like a truck at the end of his career, generously leaving his foul breath tickling my nostrils.

Well, it's a little bitchy but usual galley that makes you laugh by telling it later.

Anyway when you travel, you have to expect several types of misadventures!

I'm Lucile, I have 27 years and I tramp alone in South America for four months now.

The announcement of the departure trip to your loved ones

When you announce your departure to your loved ones, panic on board! They tell you how crazy you are to go alone, and why and how, and what you'll do when you get home. So you make the girl sure of her saying that everything will be fine, that you will meet lots of cool people and that this is the "Aventuraaaa".

Except that once arrived, with the haste to meet new people and prove to your relatives that you were right, you find yourself alone in your dormitory of ten beds crying on the phone with your mother saying "mamaaaan, why did I do that?

Haha, you did not expect to say, a week after "but wow it's deadly here, I never want to go home, fuck France".

So no, the anxiety does not last very long. After a little adjustment, you meet lots of people. And there, the Aventura really begins

The adventure begin :

I discover, I speak, I drink, I dance, I drink, I dance, I speak (more very well) I move, I meet, I rebouge, I take full view, I dance, I eat (yes when same) but bad, I rerebouge. The ultimate kiff.

After, you still have small moments of loneliness where your loved ones miss you. And when you tell them about your blues, they answer you more or less "oh that's ok, you travel everywhere, you meet lots of people, you're not to complain lucky!"

Except that after a while, you're tired of having the same repetitive discussion "hello, how are you? Where do you come from ? Where did you go? What did you prefer? What do you do in life ? When are you coming back ? ".

Clearly, it's the Tinder of the trip.

The difference ? Instead of sending you in the air, you will visit the city or go on an excursion, because you only have to put your teeth in your mouth and at least you are not alone. It's like sex, it's good alone but still better with two.

And then sometimes you come across THE girl or THE guy, love / love, love, big feeling, you talk for hours, and the person knows you almost better than your friends. You start making plans on the comet, you imagine going around the world with her / him and maybe she will become your best friend for life or he, the father of your children, -yes when you travel, you lose a bit of attachment - and there, he / she tells you "ah but me my trip is over, I go back tomorrow! And all your dreams collapse.

And then you leave again, you rerencontres, you redécouvres, you resume full view, you rebois, you redanses, you sleep (you try at least), you revisit, you rekiffes.

All this is perfect for the hyperactive that I am and who gets tired very quickly.

However, it involves undoing and redoing his (mega huge giga) bag all 2-3 days, dotted in each hostel panties here, a sock there. At least it takes a few grams.

The bus, your natural habitat

Not to mention the weekly reunion with your faithful friend, the bus! It becomes your natural habitat, your little home, you feel so good. Haha, I'm kidding, if only!

Yes, you still believe that you will manage to sleep despite the turns of death, the roads at the edge of the cliff and the grainy soil that bounces you in all directions. It is in these moments that I say to myself "fortunately I have small breasts".

Note that there is a lot going on on the bus, which, it must be said, is the culmination of your trip where you feel the most.

Like feeling a chill of panic when you see the driver making the sign of the cross as if to reassure himself, before starting to turn the box completely. Or feel very uncomfortable having a couple behind you sniffing coke while fooling you the whole way. Or, fix your feet when a guy completely mabul who taps everywhere, goes shirtless, leans against your seat and looks at you insistently (his way to seduce me).

Let's not forget my favorite place: the little corner. This is the moment you dread the most, when it's more than 24h that you stop peeing. This big suspense when you open the door, spice up your trip a little. You can have a very nice surprise as a very ugly. Afterwards, it's all about controlling your balance, knowing your support and knowing how to aim correctly. A real challenge.

In short, if you survive at the Aventura bus, you are ready to face everything.

Get out of your comfort zone

Ah, and who says "trip," says "get out of his comfort zone". Me, I see it a little like tests, obstacles to cross.

Glam tests:

  • The icy shower coming out of a jet of pipe, in dirty common showers with doors that do not close.
  • Make you literally devour the body by mosquitoes, then spend your time scratching and tearing your skin (I'm talking about fifty buttons)
  • Have diarrhea every third day due to an unhealthy diet.

Tests of community life:

  • Stopping you from going to choke your snoring neighbor
  • Take on yourself when your roomates wake you up coming home drunk singing and bickering (sometimes it's you in their place, so no choice but to put it on the back burner)
  • Keep your cool when someone stole your cheese (which you paid super expensive) in the common fridge.

Tasting tests:

  • Get frustrated when you are starving and the only thing you find is an oily empanada with a taste of dog food that attracts all the flies.
  • Hold back your tears when the hostels write "breakfast included", that you imagine fruits, pancakes, cereals, a fresh juice .. And that you discover a plate of white beans and scrambled eggs.

But what would my trip be without these galleys that punctuate my everyday life as a barrister? A poor tasteless tale as sad as the Parisian rain;)


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